Where's the Pub, I'm a student dontcha know!

Yep thats right i'm a Student (again) yesterday I went to college and picked my options for my Access course. In September I will be studying level 3 Biology and Human physiology, level 2 Maths and a toolkit for uni, eeep so thats it the road to Diagnostic Radiography starts here, i want to run out and buy all my pens, pencils, rubbers, paper, folders, folder dividers, a shed load of tippex and a sparkly bag to put it all in and i want to buy it NOW!!!!!! i'm too giddy to wait, sod buying uniform and stuff for the kids, i want my college stuff :0)

It looks like I qualify for help with childcare, and i may qualify for an adult learners grant too, i'm going to college next week for the why's and wherefore's GIDDY!!!!!!!

We had a meeting today about Harry, the senco for the childrens centre has been brilliant and we are really pushing for a referal to the educational pysch as soon as poss, feel much happier about stuff and things seem to be going in the right direction, just need to get Pheebz sorted now and she is at the dietitians tomorrow, cross fingers everyone!

Nana Molly

This is nana molly easter monday 2009
This is Nana Molly, the pic was taken xmas eve 2008.

Yesterday we laid her to rest, she fought bloody valiantly against brain cancer but she sadly lost the battle last Saturday 16th May 2009.

Let me tell you about Nana Molly, i can really sum her up in one word - Love, She was the kindest, most loving, generous soul I have ever met.

She welcomed me to her family with open arms, and i am all the more blessed for knowing her, i truely am. You know when she collasped the very first time and was taken to hospital, we found out at the same time that Pheebz had heart problems and we had to whip her off down to Alder Hey, Stew and the kids were ill so couldnt come with me, and all Nan was bothered about was me and Phoebe, she had just found out she had terminal cancer and she was more worried about me - she was totally selfless, i know she shed tears in private about her illness but if anyone asked her about it her reply was *it is a bother* and that was it.

Yesterday at her funeral Brookhouse methodist chapel was packed to the rafters with people who had the good fortune to have known and loved her, she was interred at Quernmore methodist Church yard, she is now back with Teddie, and that makes me glad, but to know i wont see her again for a long long time makes my heart hurt.

I want to put here what i never got to tell her.

Nan, Thank you, Thank you for welcoming me into your family and making me feel like one of your own, I know Stew and I didnt always do things in the right way ( Abbie first and then getting married) but you took it all in your stride, and i'm so so glad you had a little strop that made us change our wedding plans, You were so right the day was so much better because of you. I just wish i had known you for longer, but the last ten years have been an absolute pleasure, and i'm so glad you got to meet and love my Children, who absolutely adored you as much as I did, I love you Nan, and i'm glad you are at peace and painfree, but I miss you so much, I will look after Stew and the kids as well as I can.

Heaven has a new Angel and Mary Huddleston that is you, god bless you nan
With all my love
Sara XXXX

The end is beginning

Nan is in the hospice, she is getting steadily more confused and upset, she is convinced that she has missed P's christening and its upsetting her greatly.

Its so fucking unfair, she is a kind gentle soul and she doesnt deserve this, she should just drift off peacefully and with dignity, she shouldnt be living her final days in confusion and being scared of where she is, she is a very devout methodist lady very steadfast in her faith, I wish I had her convictions and strength of character, lets just say my life has been blessed for the better in knowing Nana Molly.

Shifting the fat ass

so we start!! :0) power walking is my new bezzie mate, Did a large circuit of beaumont/skerton last night and then 30 mins on the wii fit, not going out for a PW tonight, as I have been into town and back today and I am tackling mount st ironing later once the kidlets are in bed, so i think 4-5 power walks and at least 1 gym session a week is do-able or at least i'm going to make it do-able!

ooo ooo oooo managed a little run last night too only 3 lamposts but hey its a start!!! :0)

whats that strange feeling????

Hmmmmmmm, I feel strange - I feel hopeful and calm, tis most strange, since Stewbertina ballerina had the snip, I feel different......................... almost relieved, my baby making days are done - now we move forward, I'm looking at college courses either an access to nursing or an access to higher education with a view to either Nursing or Radiography ( with then a view to ante-natal ultrasound) to be honest over the last 10 days or so I have had 3 people ask me if i'm a nurse, so that has gotten the cogs turning. I want to do something and be something my kids will be proud of me for.

I feel giddy, i have a fluttery feeling inside, but I am going to take little steps one at a time, starting with the access courses, I dont want to get all giddy as envitably if i get excited and run with it, a giant spanner appears in the works


watch this space

ok motivation starts now!

I have been looking into how you start running, so i briskly walked to church this morning (thought i better show my face) then brisk walked/ran back TBH it was more walking as i just couldnt seem to run,and i cant jog at all, i either have to run like the devils after me or walk, its reet strange!!!! it didnt help that a lovely lady called Dorothy gave me a bag of stuff for Abbie, so i tried to run bag in hand :roll: and ended up shoving it down my fleece so it i looked pregnant again lol

had a reading with Marilyn last night, she told me all about the diabetes i have, she also said that she can see problems with blood pressure ( i have 3 kids what do you expect!!!)and colestrol too and that there will be a change of medication too ( i'm being re checked in july if my sugars have risen then i start metformin and statins) so motivated saz starts now!

Proud blog!!!

My little brother ladies and gentlemen! last night he won the inspirational team leader of the year at the Lancashire Police awards held at Hutton. He is an acting sargent for the specials, everything he does is totally voluntary, he organises nights out for his team and makes sure they are really well looked after, he was nominated by his Inspector and one of the Police Officers he works with and it was voted on by 3 independant Police Officers from other divisions. He knew he was going to the awards do, but had no idea he was up for one :0)

And this is the boy who at school was told he was thick and stupid (he is dyslexic), i think he has showed them!!!!!!