Friday 5 March 2010

My name is Sara and i'm mentally ill

There you go, i've just broken the biggest taboo, it is okay to have a visible physical illness but not a mental one. Depression is a horrid illness - one I fear I may never be free of - not even sure how to manage it, I dont know if I need to up my happy pills or if its my diabetes, all I know is i'm not enjoying life at the moment, everything is a hurdle, sometimes the hurdle can look as big as a mountain.

We are going to see Lee Mack tomorrow, Stew bought me the tickets back in July for my birthday, and I wont believe we are going until I step out of the door, I just know my luck someone will start puking tonight and we wont be able to go.

I am sick and tired of being sick and tired, I want the noise in my head to stop, I want to feel at ease and at peace with myself, I want the joy back in my life, I want to enjoy every moment. I dont want to be feeling sad, guilty, stress and angry anymore.

I want to be Tigger and not Eeyore

3 comments:

Gwilli said...

((Sara)) you are the kindest loveliest person.. you have had an awful time and you have every right to feel like crap.

Sam S said...

I don't know a single person (me included) who hasn't had the happy pills. Modern life is just a bitch sometimes and keeping going gets to be a real fight but you will get there. Plus your a star : )

Melanie said...

veryday is a challange. But we overcome and groow stronger. We love, we laugh, we cry..we stomp our feet like toddlers. But we keep moving forward. Why? because we are Mothers, wives and women. Be strong Saz. Believe in yourself. And through this..You can do anything!!!

XOXOXOXOOX